Leave now if you’re not in the mood for a profanity laced tirade over some fat woman in the airport. Seriously, this chick pissed me off.
Taking the easy way out? What the hell did she just say?
I am sitting on a plane, and an overweight woman sits across from me. She needs a seatbelt extender, but before she asks for one, she tells the stranger in the seat next to her that she has lost 53 pounds, and can’t wait until she doesn’t need one! Well, good for her, right?
Then the guy next to her says, “I’ve lost 50 pounds myself. I know how you feel.”
And the fat bitch says, “Did you do it the easy way, or did you have to work for it?’
I IMMEDIATELY know what she means. He does not. She clarifies by saying, “The easy way – you know, surgery.”
Pardon my current inability to demonstrate the incredible command I possess of the English language when I say, with all due respect, fuck you, lady. How dare you sit there, eating doughnuts, drinking soda, reading magazines about becoming a writer, and all the while you have as much tact and understanding as Rush Limbaugh at the Democratic Convention.
Because tell the truth. There is NOTHING easy about this. You assume because I lost 100 pounds without hiring Jillian Michaels to run my fat ass into the ground that I took the easy way out?
Again, fuck you, lady.
I know people don’t know. They can’t imagine what it’s like, four days post-op, barely able to drink a shot glass full of water, and your family orders pizza. You sit there with your head telling you that your first born could be sold into slavery in exchange for a slice of the cheesey goodness the rest of the family is enjoying. Your stomach wants to vomit. An ounce of water has convinced you that food will never again enter your body unless you are strapped down, being force fed with a funnel, but you want that pizza so badly, you would sell your soul and the souls of all the faithful departed in exchange for a small smackeral.
Miss “Easy Way Out” doesn’t get it that for a year, I ate only chicken soup. My hair fell out, and some of it never came back. My skin hangs and sags so that I get infections so itchy, painful, and smelly that I don’t even want to be in public sometimes. I travel with a tube of Desitin with me to help combat the uncomfortable rashes. How embarrassing is it to have a TSA agent look at you, with no diaper aged children, trying to get your Desitin through security?
How easy was it to drive home from my daughter’s class for 2 hours in excruciating pain, only to find out I wasn’t having a particularly horrid episode of dumping? It was my small bowel, twisting around itself, begging for emergency surgery in order to save my life. I missed Eilis’ sixth birthday party. I spent a week in the hospital on IV nutrition only and gained 10 pounds. How’s that for “easy” Miss Doughnut Eating Witch?
Let’s talk about choking down barely palatable protein shakes, washing down fistfuls of vitamins and supplements, and still ending up anemic, with osteoporosis and mulitple vitamin deficiencies.
Have you ever sat in a chair on your birthday and cried because you realized you couldn’t have birthday cake anymore? Have you had to sit in a movie theater while the family munches on delicious buttered popcorn, knowing you couldn’t enjoy it with them? Have you ever walked up to receive Communion at Mass and wondered if the Body of Christ was going to land you on the bathroom floor, puking your guts up?
So sit there in your seat belt extended chair, shove more doughnut into your face, and tell people how you are losing weight the right way.
Oh – and you wanna be a writer? Let me give you some advice. Open your mind, shut your mouth, and do your research. Life isn’t about how you PERCEIVE things, it’s about how you LIVE them. If you haven’t walked a mile in my shoes, don’t tell me how much my feet hurt.
anna ~ I SO wish we had been able to meet up this past w/e so I could brag that I actually met you!
What an incredible story! Totally not offended. Not one bit! Don’t let ignorant people get to you, though. Its a huge shame that their lives are so “uneventful” that they lack the detail & adventures that most of us go thru & the class & tact to handle themselves appropriately in public.
You are a wonderful person!!
Anna, some people just want to be admired for their false accomplishments because they have never done anything real worth mentioning. They talk loudly in public and hope that everyone finds them charismatic and worthy of their attention. If she was bragging and stuffing her face, she has accomplished nothing and will be a miserable fat woman forever–with or without the weight.
I wish there was a “STFU” button like that Staples “Easy” button –except I want it to be shaped like a remote control so the person can see it being pointed directly at them.
Sorry you had to go through such hell after your surgery and then be subjected to the ignorance of this woman. Glad you are home now with your loving family.
Maggie, I love you. ‘Nuff said.
Maria – I’m sure there would be no bragging involved, but we will totally have to get together! I’m sure there will come a time when our paths will cross!
Thank you, guys!
I took the EASY WAY OUT – and I am so happy I did! This month will be my two year, 130lb anniversary of the best decision I ever made FOR my life.
People don’t understand that the weight loss surgery option isn’t always “an option”. I waited 7 years to be granted permission to undergo bariatric surgery – because I was healthy morbidly obese – in what world does that even make sense? I was 250lbs at 5ft tall, and active. My life includes working full time, pursuing higher education (hiking across University campus is meant for healthy young people, not 30+ moms who just worked all day), golfing and going downhill skiing, walking my dog, and managing a household.
My EASY WAY OUT allows me to add cardio kickboxing, being able to walk six times as far as before without having an asthmatic attack, or heart palpitations…pretty much what any other human being enjoys – but all that didn’t stop me from being active – or living my life every day.
Those who think that bariatric surgery is the easy way out, must also believe that arterial bypass is also an easy way out…with their sense of logic, those with plaque build up in their arteries should just stop eating cholesterol, diet and exercise – clearly their blockages are a symptom of their inability to control their intake of eggs and bacon. I am tired of hearing about how I took the easy way out – but so glad I did! I am sure you are too!
PS – I hope they charged her for TWO seats!
Anna, I so knew what she was talking about the second I read it too. I know a handful of people that have gotten wls and I don’t think a one of them thought it was ‘easy’ in any way. I love that people can judge others so quickly without knowing their truth. =/ I’m sorry you had to experience that AND the difficulties you’ve endured. If I was there I would’ve sat on her for you. 😉
Oh, Honey, I almost sat on her myself! It’s that whole shyness thing that saved her life. I said to my husband, “If only I was a little more like you at that moment….”
Can I send out a resounding FUCK YOU to that woman too??? The NERVE of some people!!!!!! I just want to hug you right now, so I’m mustering up all my energy to send the warmest hug I can give across the miles to you. I love you, Anna, and I had NO idea you went through all that. I guess I need to read your blogs more often. You’re the one who should be a writer … that was just awesome!
What a FING BITCH….good think I was not there or we would have come to blows….take the easy way out. Yes, having your intestines rearranged…yes easy. Still have issues eating I am over 2 years out. Remember could barely eat when we were in Disney together in 2008.
We still work at it every day.
Yes the easy way out….YEAH RIGHT.
Anna – this is a wonderful blog post…thank you so much for sharing it with us. It boggles my mind that people think there is an ‘easy’ way and a ‘hard’ way to lose weight. There is NOTHING easy about it. Period.
I am sorry you had to go through so much (and that you had to listen to such an ignorant person on the plane).
Anna- Some people are just so ignorant. I’ve had a gastric bypass, I know all to well your pizza story. There is nothing easy about it (though my sugar cravings are mostly gone after eight years) and it’s a heroic step some choose in saving their lives. What a wench, sitting there passing judgement. I’m not so sure I could have kept my mouth shut if I had heard that. Kudos to you!
Anna,except for the doughnuts-I would have thought the same thing. 53 pounds, whether gastric or “the hard way” is awesome. Even though she was an ignorant loudmouth-kudos for her-but put down the damn doughnuts! I did not realize the horrors you went thru after your surgery, but, in all fairness-doing it the “other way” (not qualifying either way as easy) is no picnic either. You can’t have the pizza,the popcorn, the birthday cake, etc because you weigh each calorie and fat gram against what you need to put into the weight machines or treadmill to get even one hard earned pound off. You are on a tightly restricted food intake program, a backbreaking exercise regime, just to get “normal” again. Loose skin, ditto. I am NOT saying you (and all GB people) took an easy way out-but watching someone lose that much weight so fast does tend to give the impression it is easier than sweating each fat gram off individually. Each person has to make their own choice on how to take the weight off, and their only concern should be with themselves, not anyone else’s choice.
BUT-blowhearts and idiots should never speak out loud-especially while cramming doughnuts in their fat mouths~personally I would have claimed “turbulence” and reached over and shoved the doughnut down her throat! Here’s hoping your GB problems are thoroughly behind you-no pun intended! 😉
just an FYI….even though we have a gastric bypass we still have to work at it just like everyone else. We still have to watch what we eat, and exercise regularly whether at the gym or at home going for walks or even using exercise dvd’s. We have to sweat it off too. Gastric bypass is simply a tool to make us listen to what our bodies are telling us and that is it. Do we puke or get diarreah? ABSOLUTELY!! but that is if we eat too much or too fast or even too much sugar. My grocery shopping consists of checking every label to see just how much sugar, fat and calories I am putting in my mouth. I have currently lost 205 pounds and still have more to go. I also had surgery 3 1/2 years ago and I have no regrets doing what I did by having the surgery. It was the BEST thing for me and saved my life. I was told that I would have died if I did not have the surgery. I am glad that you do not have the complete attitude of other people out there and you are willing to learn more (I hope) if people fill you in. Every day is a struggle just like everybody else.
WTG, Anna! Tell it like it is. I still can’t believe people think WLS is “the easy way out.” Go, girl. Now if only we knew who she was so we could spam her email with a million copies of this blog post!
After hearing your stories this weekend, I can only imagine how frustrating it is to hear that. Some people should just keep their mouth shut.
Anna: OMG I love this post…I could have written it! I have had so many say “you took the easy way out” NO WE DIDN’T! I am adding my FUCK YOU to your blog. I actually just sent an e-mail off to Richard Simmons the other day…he was on a show plugging his new show and saying how WLS was the ‘easy way out’ and I was horrified. I idolized this man for years…did a lot of his programs…defended him to people. I have actually seen him send people off to have the surgery and now he is downing it! WTF? The e-mail was nice but to the point, that if I didn’t have WLS 3 and 1/2 years ago and go through over a year of 5 days a week at the gym with a trainer, being sick at even the site or smell of food…etc…I would be well over 500 lbs now and not able to be a wife or mother. I literally tired everything as you know! There was no other way…and like you…wanting to know if going to communion was going to send me into dumping and being a eucoristic minister, and feeling down right guilty when telling my pastor that I had to pass on the wine. He was wonderful about it…but I felt horrible, but it made me so sick! Anyway, I am so glad I found your blog. Have seen you post about it, but never checked it out. You go girl! Love ya!
Thank you so much, Midge! I did all of Richard Simmons programs, too (I probably still have Deal a Meal cards stuck behind a sofa or something somewhere) – and always thought he of all people would be sympathetic and supportive, no matter how you lose your weight.
I’m glad you found me too 🙂
Great post! i myself just had wls(lap band) back in dec. It has been a struggle so far and I often think did I take the easy way out. Than I relize all that I have sacrificed so far and will continue to. I am a mom of 3 kids and the hardest thing has been preparing meals that I cant eat or even taste to see if it is good. i am so happy i found your blog!!! i am a huge Disney also!!!
sorry forgot to add fan next to Disney!!!
I’m pretty sick of the sob stories from people who have CHOSEN to have bypass. Everyone who undergoes this surgery is forewarned of all the risks, side effects, downsides, etc….so STOP bitching about it!!!! And you have to admit, the side effects suck, but you sure as hell didn’t have to go through months or years of self discipline of good eating habits and working your ass off at the gym like many people who lose weight naturally. Many people claim to have tried that route and failed. Honest lifestyle changes don’t fail. People fail themselves. So when people say it’s the “easy way out”, I think that is what they are referring to. Instead of replying with a “fuck you”, why don’t you look in the mirror and ask yourself why you didn’t get yourself some therapy, a nutritionist, and a gym membership. Losing weight is about lifestyle change and learning sensible eating habits. Surgery forces a lifestyle change ONLY because you physically cannot eat what you used to, not because you have enough common sense to put the fork down. You are not a martyr because you had bypass. There is nothing admirable about it!! People can bitch and moan and give every self defeating story in the book, but it doesn’t change the fact that it was if not the “easy” way out, the LAZY way out.
Thank you, Carrie, for your participation in this conversation! You can see my reply in it’s very own blog post!
right on, Carrie! I fight daily to keep the weight off. gastric bypass is a much easier way then living your life counting calories and hitting the gym. I am 60 and volunteer at the hospital to stay physically active. I have asthma, arthritis, a knee replacement and am a breast cancer survivor, yet am a size 8 and look and feel great. i i am sick of people who still eat crap, but less of it after their gastric surgeries. my boss is 30 years younger than me, had the surgery and eats horrible food, never exercises and relies on the surgery to losevweight. SO WRONG!
Excuse me Miss Anonymous! But, we who have gastric bypass DO watch what we eat and go to the gym 5-6 times a week. If your co-worker is going to eat food that is junk food then that is her problem and she should have never had the surgery. She will gain every pound or ounce that she has lost due to the surgery and the what you call “easy weight loss” will definitely come to a stop. If you don’t know what we all go through before surgery or even after surgery then please do yourself a favor and shut your mouth. I have had it with people saying it is the easy way out because I struggle just like every other person who is supposedly doing it the “natural” way. Is using the south beach diet, atkins diet, grapefruit diet, cabbage soup diet, nutri-system, jenny craig or even slim fast the natural way? I am sorry but people do more harm to their bodies and their systems by following fad diets. You should definitely do more research on topics like this before your mouth opens.
Who the fuck is Carrie and why does she even have access to your blog? Perhaps she is that very lady from the airport. Douchebag!
Anyone who has not had GB doesn’t know it is its own kind of struggle. And to Carrie and the “Anonymous” poster, I don’t know one person who has been successful with GB who doesn’t spend time in the gym and watch what they eat. If you eat junk food and don’t exercise post GB you *will* gain the weight back.
Anna, I love your blog. It is so honest and real. I used to work for a surgeon that performed Bariatric surgeries and could attest that it is not the easy way out! There are many complications and side effects as you well know. There is a mortatlity rate with risks involved. It is major life changing surgery- definitely not the “easy way”! He always decribed the surgery as only a tool. You have to use the tool properly to achieve the desired effect.. in this analogy this lady’s “tool” is sitting on a cob web, dust covered shelf in her mind… not used properly i9t can be dangerous or just ineffective which is dangerous in itself considering the reason one has surgery is to improve health.
I am on a few other boards with you and only know you through our Disney ties we have in common, but I totally appreciate that you are a real person with real life experiences. Life is not always a happily ever after fairy tale and you are writing your own life story through experience- your strength shows through ! Thanks for being an inspiration!
Thanks so much for being so kind and supportive. You would know even better than I that gastric bypass is not an easy road – even if you are successful! And you know, no matter how much pixie dust you sprinkle sometimes, life is not always going to end up with you in a fairy tale castle with a handsome prince. My husband and I have arguments, my girls are not perfect (not even practically perfect sometimes), and I am not Martha Stewart. I think it’s good to put REAL out there once in a while 🙂
Thanks again!
Thank you so much for you post. I am sick of people saying WLS is an easy way out and you summed up how I feel completely and I thank you.