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Forget the Loch Ness Monster

There are stories that we can recall back to our childhoods.  A good many of them involve life’s mysteries.  We’ve all seen the grainy photos claiming to be positive proof of the existence of Big Foot.  And who can forget the dark, blurry silhouette of the Loch Ness Monster?  Today, I have even seen a report of a bizarre one eyed albino shark.

I can almost believe in the existence of these mythical creatures.  As hard as I try, I don’t see a zipper running down the back of Big Foot.  I’m pretty sure I don’t see any place to put the batteries in the back of Nessie.  Oh – and the cyclops albino shark?  He’s for real.

But the one mythical creature I have yet to see captured on any grainy, thumb over the lens, almost but not quite sure you see it?  The child that cleans up after themselves.  It is a pursuit I have been on for over 20 years – this mysterious character who allegedly makes a mess, then picks it up.  I know – it makes you gasp, doesn’t it?  The mere thought of such a beast existing in our world sends maternal hearts into a fluttery rage.

I’ve heard tales of the kid that gets a drink of milk, puts the lid BACK ON THE BOTTLE, CLOSES THE REFRIGERATOR DOOR, and, if you haven’t passed out yet, WIPES THE KITCHEN COUNTER CLEAN OF DROPLETS OF MILK!!  I know – it’s almost too much to imagine!

But wait – I’ve heard other fairy stories of these angelic little pixies who come in from school, DON’T drop their backpacks by the door, DON’T toss their shoes off in the middle of the entryway to your home, AND sit right down to do their homework!

The thing that finally convinced me to end my search?  Someone threw it over the top when they told me these same imaginary beings don’t fight with their sisters AND have nothing strewn on their bedroom floors.

Now that’s going too far.