I was watching an old episode of Seinfeld while doing homework this evening, and in this particular episode, George, who is unhappily engaged to Susan. When he learns that he happens to be Marisa Tomei’s “type”, he begs Elaine to have her friend, who knows the Oscar winning actress, introduce him. Elaine refuses, because, after all, George has Susan, and this would be cheating.
I think it’s highly unlikely that I’m going to be walking through the WalMart, wearing the same sweats that I slept in the night before, hair pulled up in a pony tail, wearing my “comfortable” underwear (you know they aren’t the matching Victoria’s Secret good stuff), and have Pierce Brosnan walk up to me and say, “Oh, you sexy thing, you’re sooo my type! Those $5 sweat pants are driving me crazy, and that bacon grease perfume you’re wearing is giving me ideas!” But…
…would I want Jim to give me a day off if Pierce Brosnan was shopping in my local WalMart and announced that I was his type?
If the tables were reversed and Sade was wandering the aisles of Lowe’s the same time Jim was (which is always), and she took a liking to the way he wears his Navy veterans baseball cap, or the sexy gym shorts he sports all summer long, would I give him a pass to spend 24 hours pursuing the woman of his fantasies?
If I could get Sade to take on some of my Jim responsibilities for 24 hours, I’d be tempted to cut that man loose for a day. Can she trim his nose hairs? Will she pick up the pistachio shells he drops on the floor and doesn’t see when he gets up? Does she cut toenails?
I may not be willing to give a full access pass, but I think I’d let him spend a day. If a fantasy walks in the door, do you open the window to let it out? I can’t imagine I would.
Alright, Jim. If you bump into Sade in the lock department at Lowe’s, go for it. Well, not “it”, but feel free to take that woman to the all she can eat Chinese buffet. You are so her type.
