Jon Plus 8 Minus Kate?

I am going to start by telling you up front – I am not a fan of the Gosselin family variety show, also known as Jon & Kate Plus 8.  If you are even less of a fan than I am, this TLC television reality show follows the life of Jon and Kate Gosselin and their brood of eight children – including a set of twins and a gaggle of sextuplets. 

Now you know, if I am anything, it is a fan of the reality TV shows.  I watch the Little People, the Big Losers, the Surviving People, the Amazing Racing people, the wannabe Idols, the wannabe chefs, the wannabe designers, the wannabe sobers.  There are very few (Gene Simmons’ Family Jewels and Rock of Love) that I can’t sit through.  If the name Bobby Trendy ever comes up on a Trivial Pursuits question, you will want to be on my team!

But when it comes to the Gosselin family, well, it’s like watching The Taming of The Shrew, only the Bizarro World version, where the Shrew can’t be tamed and she comes seeking vengeance against those that tried to shut her the hell up.

There is a scene in the movie Arthur – one of my favorite movies of all time – where Dudley Moore comes late at night looking for the apartment of his girlfriend Linda.  He goes to the wrong apartment, where he encounters Perry and Perry’s wife.  Perry’s wife is a screaming bitch of a woman, and poor Perry just stands there, helpless. 

Jon Gosselin is Perry, and Kate, Perry’s wife.  “Don’t you hate Perry’s wife?”

In the few episodes I have seen of Jon and Kate, Kate is belittling Jon; reprimanding him for inappropriate to her standards behavior; criticizing him for something he’s done; and handing him his testicles on a plate.  So the tabloid rumors that Jon is out boozing and carousing with other women, avoiding going home in favor of crashing at his mom’s home three hours away – it’s not surprising.  If anyone deserves to be drunk and canoodling, it’s the poor, under appreciated Jon. 

It’s one thing to be a total control freak – and I admit, with eight children, you’d have to pretty much be a control freak to avoid complete chaos in your home – but it’s something else entirely to be one on national television, and doing it in a way that makes your husband look like the hapless victim of a steamroller.

I’m sure there’s a perfectly good reason for the rumor mill to be churning out these rumors.  Maybe ratings are down, and they need to stir things up a little.  Will you tune in to see if Jon shows up at home one night with lipstick on his collar?  I probably won’t.  But I will be cheering him on the day he gets those testicles back for good!