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Cuba Gooding, Jr. – Saving the Whales or Just Saving a Buck?

I hate this commercial.  I’ll tell you up front – I am not the crunchy granola, save the planet, super conscious about the environment mom.  Honey, if it’s gonna hold my Jersey girl big hair do in during hurricane force winds, I might not look twice at how many chlorofluorocarbons are in it – or consider how many insect species my using 32 cans a week might endanger.

But I hate this commercial.  I hate that they lure you in with the beauty and majesty of a creature as magnificent as a whale, tug at your heartstrings by alluding to the whale’s impending extinction, and then turn on the happy music and tell you that rather than putting your efforts into protecting this lovely beast, what the hell, grab a bunch of your friends and head off on a whale watching cruise!

Those crazy whales, up to all kinds of frolicking and playing  (as you do when your species is threatened), just waiting for you and 99 of your best buds to come cruising by, snapping pictures, commenting on how closely they resemble your Uncle Herb (the whale, by the way, is offended by such rude comments), dropping crap overboard into their homes.

And because you’re using Groupon, you’ll be doing it at half price!

Does Cuba recommend you take your savings and send it into some Save the Whales organization?  He does not.  As a matter of fact, I’m half waiting for them to tell me that you’ll need the other half of the money to bail your ass out of jail after you get carried away having such a grand time drinking and carousing out there on the high seas.

Yeah – don’t mix business with pleasure.  You want to talk to me about saving the whales?  Go ahead.  But don’t pull back just before you make a valuable point.  Cuba, you’re gonna have to whale watch without me 🙁