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Brazilian Wax – Who Thinks Up This Stuff?

I have this amazing friend Gary who does videos for Walt Disney World.  In the videos, there’s always Rob, an innocent bystander who warns Gary not to do the action he is about to perform.  This voice of reason always advises Gary not to do something potentially stupid.

I do not have a voice of reason in my house.  And I’m on spring break, so I’m supposed to get drunk and do crazy things.  So when the subject of a Brazilian wax came up, I found myself in the car, driving up to central Jersey, signing it at the European Wax Center.

So, for those that are unfamiliar, a Brazilian wax, it basically eliminates all of the hair from you, ummmm, hooha.  Some women opt to leave a “landing strip”, and I’ll leave to the imagination which my preference was.  Hot wax is applied, and then it’s ripped off, along with the unwanted hair.

Where is Rob, MY innocent bystander, when I need him?

If you read all about Brazilian waxes before you go to the salon, or watch some of the YouTube videos that are available, you may reconsider the whole thing.  You’ll see women, in hysterical laughter, as they lay on waxing tables trying not to cry.  You’ll read about infections, Jersey trying to ban this type of waxing, and, of course, mentions of Sex and the City, the show that apparently popularized the Brazilian.

Don’t believe everything you read – or see – on the web.

Is there pain involved?  Okay, well, yeah.  I mean, let someone yank hairs out of your vajayjay and you’re going to feel something.  But is it as bad as I expected it to be?

Not really.  Don’t tell my husband, because I expected to be able to milk this for about a week.

Yes, you’re going to experience some pain.  But I would say it’s not unbearable in any way.  And they tell me the more you do it, the less it hurts.  The hair becomes finer and more sparse, and there’s not as much “yanking” that goes on.

Things I learned today – take a Tylenol about an hour before you go.  That will help with the discomfort.  The longer your hair, the more yanking there is.  Yanking does not mean it feels good.  The top of the “V” hurts more than you think it will.  The lower bits hurt way less.

The tech that did my wax had seven years experience, and she was good.  I had to strip from the waist down (and don’t expect your tech to step out and allow you that last shred of dignity while you undress – they don’t), and lay on my back on the table.  You put the bottoms of your feet together, with your legs splayed out like butterfly wings.  You’re gonna be wishing you were at the ob/gyn office about now.  There’s no being modest if you’re going to get this done.

And then, as if there’s not enough humiliation, they do your behind.  There are various ways they make this happen, but mine was done while on my back, legs up in the air.  And the further down you go from the top of the “V”, the less it hurts.  Seriously.

The result – nice 🙂  I’m super impressed by how clean and comfortable this feels.  I’ve been bikini area shaving for years, and this is WAY better.

I already have my next appointment, so you know it couldn’t have been TOO bad!  Or else the endorphins are clouding my ability to make rational decisions.

Where’s that bystander again??

3 Replies to “Brazilian Wax – Who Thinks Up This Stuff?”

  1. I had it lasered off and don’t regret a thing! It was expensive but over the course of the past 8 years or so, I would have spent way more on waxing…I’d rather lose my dignity for 5-6 sessions (me 3) than go back time after time…I guess you build a repoise with your “waxer”…next time maybe put a Disney Crown on the V. LOL! Show your man who owns the crown around your house ;o) You’re way braver than me!! I had to use lidocaine when I got a tatoo–that’s the scaredy cat I am.

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